“If you own this story, you get to write the ending.” – Brené Brown
Do you ever feel like your life is getting away from you?
We often get caught up in the routine of life, and as moms, we’re pulled in so many different directions—a demanding job, the kids, your spouse, extended family and friends—there’s a lot going on. We go through the motions and get comfortable in the passenger’s seat, feeling like there must be more and complaining all the while. But we never really make the effort to take control of the vessel that is our lives. When something goes wrong, we’re quick to blame outside forces, seldom taking responsibility for our part in it.
Does this sound like you?
Guess what? The reality is, many of your own life decisions got you here! But what would happen if you did take responsibility? Not just when things are going well but when things are going terribly wrong. Sounds scary, doesn’t it? But if you really think about it, there’s freedom in that. Essentially, it means you are in control, and you can steer your life in the direction you want to go.
We all want freedom, and although you can’t run away from your responsibilities (at least not forever), taking ownership of your life, your decisions, and your situation can steer you towards that freedom.
What is Personal Responsibility?
“Response-ability.” Your ability to maturely react to the many difficulties and conditions of life. This means that you have the ability to stop being the victim, and instead become the purposeful creator of the life you want. Here’s how.
1. Identify Your Priorities
How will you know where to steer your life if you have no vision for where you’re going? That’s why it’s important to set goals—for 1 year from now, 5 years from now, 10 years from now. But first, figure out what your priorities are—after all, the goals that you set for yourself should reflect the things that matter most to you.
Start by asking yourself: “What matters in my life?”
There is no right or wrong answer to this question. As a mom, number one on your list is your children and your family. So start there, then add 9 others things that matter most to you right now. Some of the chart-toppers for me are:
Looking at your list, are you prioritizing the right things in your daily life? The mere fact that you can feel something is off with your life right now means that your actions aren’t aligning with your true priorities.
2. Change Your Mindset
It’s time to grab some war paint, put it on your face, and adopt a can-do attitude. Even though changing your lifestyle and habits might be difficult, it’s possible. Remember, you’re a strong, successful mom! If there’s anyone who can do it, you can. All you need is the right attitude.
Many of us let worry and negative thinking guide our actions and behaviors far too often. Instead, try to focus on gratitude. Think of your priority list: what are you grateful for related to each of the 10 priorities on your list? Write your gratitudes down and convert them into a daily affirmation that you can read to yourself as a reminder of what’s most important to you.
Emphasizing gratitude has the amazing effect of shifting your mindset to more positive thinking. And just getting rid of the negative thoughts, the what-ifs, and the doubts will do wonders to help attract your ideal reality to you.
3. Create a Vision Board
Visualization is a powerful thing. The key to creating a vision board is to focus on how you want to feel. Of course, including material things on your board won’t hurt (wanting material things is not a bad thing), but focusing on how you want to feel 5 to 10 years from now gives you a better chance of actually bringing it to life.
Your vision board might include pictures of:
A happy work-at-home-mom, playing with the kids
Symbols of professional success (Corner office? Speaking podium? Satisfied clients?)
A family doing something fun
International travel (I have Australia on my board!)
Day-spas (signifying relaxation time)
Other images that invoke memories of times that made you feel good
Remember, there are no rules. Your vision board may look completely different than someone else’s, but that doesn’t mean you’ve done it wrong. As long as it tells your story in a way that inspires you, that’s all that matters!
4. Take Action and Make it Happen
When you begin this journey of taking personal responsibility for your life, you may not know exactly what you’re doing, and that’s okay. Take it one step at a time. Set big goals and then break them down into smaller milestones, starting small.
Let’s take an example of a corporate woman who wants to achieve a certain lifestyle for her family. She wants freedom—freedom to do what she wants, when she wants, and not be controlled by the status quo, a boss, or financial obligations. After discovering that a non-traditional career with unlimited income possibilities will enable her to achieve that, she makes working from home her big goal. In order to work towards it, she sets the smaller goal of devoting one hour each day to research how to successfully work from home.
You’ll soon find that achieving smaller daily goals will motivate you to keep going and will set you on the course to establishing new, healthier routines that steer you towards freedom.
And the beauty of it all is that you set the course!
We at Moms Making Six Figures want to help you take personal responsibility for your life. We’re here to support you as you take charge, set your own course, and steer your own ship towards freedom. Visit our website www.momsmakingsixfigures.com or contact us at (858) 837-1505, and together we can help you live life on your own terms.